Honeymoon Travel Tips: Safari

Well everyone, this is it!  J. and I are officially off on our Honeymoon!  While we're gone, I've taken the liberty of scheduling some fun, helpful and hilarious guest posts which I hope will provide you with hours a few minutes of entertainment, and help you plan your own potential getaway!  I may even check in with you all from Hawaii.  Gotta love modern technology!

So without further ado, I'd like to introduce you to Heather.  Heather is my dear law school friend, who with her husband Greg, spent her honeymoon on an African Safari.  Heather has a variety of excellent tips to keep in mind if you too are planning such an adventure!

Honeymoon Travel Tips: Safari

Tip #1: Hot air balloons do not land gently.

 

More tips to know...

Don't wear blue (it attracts tse tse flies).

Deet does not repel tse tse flies.

Tse tse flies bite through clothing, but you should wear long sleeves and long pants anyway.

Yes, your malaria medicine will make you have very vivid nightmares!

Don't pet the hippos.  Don't pet the elephants.  Actually, just keep your hands to yourself.

The "African Massage" (the car bumping along the dirt roads) is not relaxing.

The best dehydration salts (which you should be sure to bring) are made by the World Health Organization!

Lions do not roar very often, generally they make huffing noises, all night long, and that IS them outside your tent.

The "loo with a view" is generally a bucket.

Bring boots, there are snakes.

Pack a liver.  There are brunch drinks, drinks at lunch, drinks at the "bush bar" while on safari, sundowners, cocktail hour, drinks at dinner, and after-dinner drinks.

Put items that you don't want messed with in the monkey box.  The monkeys will destroy whatever isn't in there while you're sleeping.

Bring long sleeves, long pants, and a headscarf so that you can be appropriately attired if going somewhere predominantly Muslim (like Zanzibar)- your "Everyone Loves a Jewish Girl" t-shirt should be left at home.

Keep in mind that you can pretty much wear whatever you want on safari, so pack clothing that is comfortable.

When a hotel says "laundry included" - this means everything except women's underwear - pack accordingly.

Bring extra cameras and memory cards- we took 3300 photos and would have taken more.

Bring an SLR or DLSR if you want good animal photos.

Actually, bring everything you might need (including plenty of batteries and battery chargers) - there's no Walgreens.

At the same time, don't pack too much - they won't let you on the small planes without a soft satchel that doesn't weigh much.

Wildebeests do not necessarily cross the Mara River like National Geographic suggests.  They often stampede all the way to the waters' edge, mill around for hours, think about crossing, and disperse.

No TV, no radio, no phone, no internet, no newspapers make for a very romantic vacation

If you like chess, checkers, monopoly and scrabble, you are in for a treat.  They are everywhere.

Your guide may think your name is VERY funny.  Everyone I met laughed and laughed when I introduced myself as "Heather."  Eventually I got used to following that up with "like weather, but with an H."

When you're the only people on a plane its not because you're flying privately.  It's because you're going to be on a cargo flight with a bazillion vegetables.

Despite being required to throw out tweezers and nail scissors, you WILL be allowed to bring a Masaai spear on the plane - ours was disassembled and wrapped in newspaper.  They make awesome souvenirs.

In whole foods, you can buy amazing coffee from Tanzania.  In Tanzania, however, there is no coffee (which, in retrospect makes sense).  Instead, enjoy your morning tea and cookies (the buttery sugary dutch kind)!